and yes... i overreact... for a reason....

maybe it's about time i thought about letting go... slowly bit by bit... having to experience that kind of news that way once is enough...


because even through that "honeymoon" period...

even through everything that i've tried to do...

even through the time i tried to take a little risk...


okay la... maybe you should know that such things and almost never ever done for no reason... there's always a reason / factor behind it... and even if there was none... i don't think i was treated the same way deserving of it all...


i would have hoped that it would be different... or it wouldn't seem so strange anymore... but why does it feel like i've never stepped out of square 1...?


unlike a certain someone... i never claimed to know anything... in fact i really don't anyways... but i'm still getting shocks and surprises... i feel so helpless... so stupid...

as if i only knew things 5 mins ago...


thanks anyways to everyone who was involved at one point or another... especially to cher and sihui... thanks for sharing in my dream... giving your comments and being so patient with me... i could feel your support and it almost felt like we were walking each step of the way together... it was something i couldn't afford to lose... and you guys knew it... but i dunno... because somewhere along the way... it all broke down...

on the bright side... it gave me a opportunity to rekindle old old old friendships didn't it...?


so where to start then... when i don't want to begin at all...? it should have been more than this by now... and such "excuses" so basically not be used at all... i wish things were more straight... at least i would know what to do next...


loads of fun while it lasted... but i just want to know what to do next... or i want the pain to go away...