so whats new...? other than empty words, lies, broken promises and shattered dreams....

"...By the end of my first hour on duty, I was enlightened. I knew what it was about guard duty that was so intolerable.

Boredom.

Guard duty was just so unbelievably boring. The seconds didn't go tick-tick-tick. They went tick. Pause. Tick. Pause. Tick."
- Michael Chiang, Army Daze

and damn it's true... and i wasn't even supposed to be doing it... thanks to my "buddy" who so coincidentally was attending B... i was chosen instead...

"it gonna be a good experience...", i tried to console myself... TRIED...

friends i told didn't offer much consolation... they were probably laughing their heads off at my predicament... sigh...

so there i was doing sentry at the ferry terminal... the very first line of defence to any would be intruders... yea yea...

(prowling might have been fun... getting to explore tekong and stuff... but walking all over wasn't exactly my cup of tea...)

the first shift i checked my watch at exactly half hour intervals...
the second...? at every 5 painful minutes...

argh... the lesser said the better...

went back to company line at 7... slept till 11... then i fell sick... the "tekong cough" they call it... and i always have a weakness for cough... coughing quite badly now... thank goodness there's phlegm... helps to soften the impact of the cough... and coupled up with a flu... just too bad then... my theory is that the "tekong cough" was started by a disgruntled cookhouse cook who finally got tired of receiving negative surveys and decided to teach us recruits a lesson...

seriously... i'm joking... but it COULD be true...

having some trouble with my section mates... but it's nothing new... even those who i rarely talk to start talking crap... strange ain't it...?

anyways... field camp's up next... and with my cough and flu... i hope it won't be too much of a hindrance... pls be praying for me...

didn't hear anything again... so i took the first step...

...

on tuesday night i bought you a gift... and we chatted...
on friday night... we played a game together...

it's only when reality hits you right back in the face... that you wake up again... panting... and you look at the sorry state you have become... hard to go back to sleep after that... so i just tossed and turned till it was time...

dreams suck alot... don't you know...?

was on the whole day... but nothing from you... oh well... nvm... seems you already have some one else in mind... taking you to all those nice places and sutff...

i'm really trying hard to forget... put you out of my mind... but you know... it's HARD...

till the next bout of "delusions of legitimate fouls" comes along then...

when something would have been nice part 2...

hope these days is overated...

i asked for something so hard... but didn't get it... i know i have done nothing to deserve it though... it's really my fault... i just hope He heard me and understands... He does work in myterious ways in His time... 'cos i think i need it badly...

kinda hoped that i would hear from you... looking at it... still waiting... oh well... it would make things so much harder and easier at the same time... still i wish it was so...

that much is true... something would have been nice...

just something...

i need to feel better...

but hope is overated right?

*runs back to watching YUI's "Thank You My Teens" Live Tour*

the true meaning of "because we love our Singapore"...

finally ended my 2 weeks confinement at tekong... cut a little short thanks to deepavali... and damn... Singapore has never looked better...

so how's army life? well... all i can say that it's gonna get tougher... but pes c la... there's a limit to what people can take here... anyways i'm fine... nothing so far that i haven't been able to handle... thanks to those who smsed... no thanks to those who didn't... lol... keep those smses coming yea? and if you haven't done so already... well... you know what to do... else you should be ashamed of yourself... lol... just joking...

well... in the army you get to meet all kinds of people... from the blur ones... to the really siao on-the-ball ones (pass already still want to better their timing... wth?)... and of course the usual ah bengs... made my fair share of friends and enemies already... well yea... enemies... it's just my character... either you learn to like or accept it... or you don't... what can i say? trouble just seems to have a nack at finding me... lol at being called selfish... i mean duh? but overall people are fairly nice... don't really know most of their names yet though... we just start talking to each other whenever there's time...

and when guys get together... what do they talk about...? so people like me sit back and listen... while the ah bengs and a few others go through their list of exes ranging from A-Z... Amelia, Berlinda, Casandra, Denise, Elaine, Fion, Gina, Helen... i kinda fell asleep after that... freakin tired...

what really irked me the most were people who set their alarm clocks to wake up early... but couldn't wake up in the end... so what you end up with is an alarm clock that wakes and keeps you up instead... and goes on ringing for another 20-30 mins (i'm serious!)... thankfully i had YUI in my ears from the 2nd night on... peacefully went back to sleep... the preciousness of 1 min more of shut-eye...

dreamt about something on one of the nights... it was the kind of dream you'd dream about having... just wanted to say thanks for waiting... i really wished it would carry on forever... even if i know that reality doesn't agree with it... but it kinda gave me the strength to continue on for a few more days... so that's good isn't it?

i try to forget but dreams and reality don't allow it...

but alls really left behind once you're on the ferry home... you finally understand the true meaning of "because we love our Singapore" (the island)...

and i look forward to hearing from you (all)....