numb to the unfairness... or is the unfairness numbing...

i'm just really fed up....

people spent theirs with tons of friends and loved ones.... and many more banners, cards and stuff...

with a ton of wishes...

heck... even she was there..... of all people....


mine...? mulling over what the heck AORs are... remittance how ah... financial reports... ARGH!!

lets be honest for a moment here.... what has he done... that i haven't...? how come his warrents such a cool night... but mine sweating over work...?

yet not a single person said anything... and the person i most hoped would remember... didn't even know...

case study in point... one day in class... some one asked to say something about him... "oh.. he's very friendly... hardworking... and really helpful...!"

excuse me... HELPFUL?!?!?! .... and me = not helpful... you've got to be joking....

i couldn't give a hoot if no one said anything... just as long as that one person would remember....



because how would i expect anything with the better friend...? would it help to say i never ever want to see you get hurt again...?

i just don't want that kind of feeling again.... but it's much too late to pull out now....


because why do i have to apologise for their mistake...? i shouldn't have to suffer one bit... i've done NOTHING to deserve this kind of treatment.... what makes me less worthy than them at all...?