i get reminded about what i'm missing.... -.-

"i don't really do this... i don't really do that...

(no actually i do... actually the truth is i just don't really give a damn...)"


gawd... and after i tried so hard to believe it.....


i don't understand why it is so easy for some people.... i'm envious alright... but that's just the way things work is it?... it's really something that you don't have to try so hard after all... because if you do... then something is severely wrong...

picked up my favourite book to read again.... and i realised he totally echoed my thoughts then... i wasn't alone in the reasons why we work so hard...

only realise it was all for nothing....

i still don't understand why it is so easy for some people.... i mean you talk talk talk talk... attempt to please... work hard... but some one else just comes in... does the same, less or nothing... well... and then it's all useless....

the lies... the time of silence and ignoring...

argh...

i did all i could already....

but you know... school's been really shitty... fucked up... the workload is crazy... so much so i actually prayed all the way to school for some peace of mind....

the worst part...? i get reminded every monday and thursday about what i'm missing....