continuing on.... why did it choose me...

or rather... why was i chosen for it...

i know it's like... again...? but please bear with me as i pen out my thoughts... it really helps me alot... at least i feel as if there's some one to listen...

so i mean... if (scratch that...) .... since it's gonna end this way... confirm... guarantee pluss chop...

why can't i be nice to myself while at it...? or is it more painful...? it depends on what we can do...

either way... i'm sorry if i drag you into it... intentionally of course... but i hope you understand some day...

it's okay if others don't wanna help... they can humiliate for all i care... but as long as i know what i'm doing... heck... isn't there that glimmer of a chance that i might be able to change the end...?

(okay i'm dreaming... but stil...)

so what was up with bringing all of that up... how enticing it was... and then... it was like nothing ever happened...

i look at them... them... them... them... why me...?

heck...

i just wanna enjoy my days.... is that so hard to ask for...? for what reason did i come here...?

it's really harder than a... "forget it..."

maybe the future me would come back and help... show me the way... let me know it's going to be alright...

(okay... too much heroes...)

when...? God...? when...?

i want to know...